The coolest new entrant of my ‘twenties’ life – ME TIME

One movie dialogue that echoed big time right after stepping out of college was,

‘College di gate de is taraf hum life ko nachate hai … te duji taraf life humko nachati hai..’

Well, I think a lot of us 90s kids will swear by this dialogue from Rang De Basanti, now that we’re actually attempting to live the best years of our lives in a cubicle, while dealing with a new pressure popping everyday.

Remember those times in college where amidst organizing festivals and setting up friends, we always managed to get time to attend that friend’s friend house party?

You may resonate to that bunch of mates, who were never really active in college, be it class or in the campus, but still had their days quickly vanish away?

It was pretty magical as the chaos of being somewhere, doing something every time, was not even remotely tiring or mentally exhausting.

We spent hours back then watching, no wait, FINISHING, sitcoms, series after series back to back each night and then be up the next day very charged up and resolving a silly fight.

There was nothing we wanted to miss out on, neither the fun with friends, nor the certificate giving, new-people meeting, college fests.

Even the lot who didn’t like doing this all, studied all the while and in the train had their fun time.

I remember being that overtly active kid of college, who wanted to do everything, be everywhere, play cupid, get my certis and also attempt to get a good rank. While doing all this for years, not a day felt exhausting or tiring.

But now even though the major part of our day is consumed by doing just one thing i.e. Work and no so many things like we did in college, all we want at the end of the day is peace. Silence. Solace. Pretty much least human contact of any form.

The time taken to travel home, which was usually spent earlier talking on the phone catching up with friends, or even relentless speed-texting on groups is now effortlessly replaced with ‘earphones’ or just looking out of the window as the wind gushing through your face, making you feel more alive after the claustrophobic air conditioner’s air all day.

A lot of texts go unanswered or some are answered halfheartedly, yes also because we are doing serious shit now, unlike college days, but I feel its more so because we are exhausted somewhere mentally most often.

The expectations we have from ourselves, coupled with the pressure of excelling due to the competition around and added with a dash of not knowing where we are going, gives a perfect blow, enough to tire out a brain which was not yet prepared for all this.

Earlier the chaos was external, so internally we were always connected with ourselves and so never felt the burden on our shoulders irrespective of the amount of things done in a day. Now the chaos is more within, due to which there’s barely any ‘quality time’ or ‘recharge time’ one gets with oneself.

Getting choosy about who you want to speak to at the end of a day at work, has shamelessly taken over the impromptu plans of late night drives all together.

Its imperative now, to sit back quietly and just look outside the window, thoughtless and quiet, for a while, as you get to your second home. Because the first one is officially your workplace by now.

I wasn’t too kicked about alot of these ‘cool responsible adult-like’ things that came in after work kicked in. But this ‘me time’ or ‘recharge time’ of a few minutes at night while getting back from work or anywhere, where I am all by myself, uninterested in the ‘notifications’ and ignoring the ‘mails’ unknowingly, just paying attention to nothing unabashedly and once in a while the music making its way sometime in the background is the most magical feeling ever.

The fact that we are now consciously finding ways to be with our own self a little more, a little connected to our soul a little more, looking for peace a little more and loving the nature a little more is for me ‘LIVING’ a little more 🙂

Welcome to my rickety twenties, ‘me time’!

 

 

 

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Why making good money in your early 20s can be the best thing for you?

Caveat – Anyone who has a legit/serious passion and is happily pursuing it may surely want to skip the contents below. This one’s more for the ones in ‘I’m still figuring out’ or ‘I want to make it big, but I don’t know what I love the most’ zone.

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“What’s your package?”, “Consultant or an employee?”, “How much are they offering you”, “What are the perks?”, “Internship or permanent?” these were just some questions which have the supernatural power of making us feel absolutely minuscule and worthless in a span of seconds irrespective of where we were or with whom we were while the door of 20s just hit us hard on the face, even before we could get out of college.

Be it the the unending conversations after drunky sessions of revelry with homies or just awkward ‘beta aap kaha kaam kar rahe ho?’ at almost unavoidable social gatherings, its practically impossible to evade the thoughts of ‘where am I going?’ and ‘what am i doing with my life?’

and just when you try to forget all of that, saala koi na koi toh tumhare market value/net worth nikaalne aa hi jaata hai, while your’re in your early twenties.

 

If this wasn’t enough to make your ripe jawaani (not sorry for that uncouth term!) exciting, we have these movies coming in every other fri-yay telling us to live like a pauper and follow our passion, follow our heart, follow our err….

But hello, agar passion hoti in the first place toh why would we sit and waste time watching such almost same-to-same movies, we would rather be lost persuing our passion for all you know. Toh boss, what about the maximum mango people, who are ordinary AF but don’t want to remain that way? They are pretty much jacked from all the sides –

Want to make big money, friends are doing so well already, looking for happiness in everything, hating monotony and how, looking for love (validation) pretty much all the time, want to have fun always and suffering major FOMO, want to work hard and be busy, causing staying office till 4am be cool, perpetually broke, perpetually want to travel, perpetually dreaming much, tired too much, bored to soon, parents pressure always….etc etc etc

WELCOME TO 20s GUYS!!

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Now that we don’t have a solid passion and not making good money at the same time can get fatal, how about not meandering in the roads of ‘looking for happiness’ or ‘looking for passion’ or ‘waiting for enlightenment’ and getting that ass to work without getting too emotional about it?

How about starting off with something that you may not like that much, but maybe you are already good at it, instead of starting off with something you’re not that great with but you still like it. And since you’re doing something you’re good at, its very likely you will get your Vitamin M too soon, which help you keep it going to meander wherever you want to. You know it’s not that bad to get lost in a jungle looking for something, after you have already achieved something. Maybe the jungle may not be kind to you, but you always know you have something else to fall back on however comfortable it may not be.

 

Money, believe it or not, has a good enough association with happiness. No happiness, not in the sense that which car you’re driving to your work to, it’s more like a confidence booster, that I can make this much, I am worth this much and so on. It’s absolutely normal to identify our worth with how much we make for a living. Good or Bad is another issue/ Fair enough for now.

So the ones, who chose not meander into the unending tunnels looking for a ray of passion and just got their ass to work and gave in their best irrespectively of how much they hated or loved what they were doing and looked at their work more objectively than subjectively, could easily tick off that “good package” wala pressuring tag from their 20s list and could actually realize the importance of looking for the purpose of existence slightly quicker than the others.

The moment you have it, you don’t want it that badly, and then the mind clears up on its own, and the smog of money disappears, only to make way for the sunlight which could unravel the truth about you and that’s when the mind makes conscious efforts to start looking for some ‘real stuff’ and I think happiness and ‘real stuff’ are pretty much next door neighbors.

No offense to anyone but an analogy could do here – a pappu in college wanting to date that pretty chick to get his confidence booster and once he has done that, he would go out looking for something/something who stirs up his soul.

No that does not mean pretty people can’t stir up your soul. A proud feminist that I am, I totally believe pretty girls are smart, full of substance and fuck they can drive well.

Anyways.

So yes, instead of just walking around in whirlpools of frustration (if any!) why not get that money desperation out the system, by just putting yourself to work (anything you’re decent at!), and trust me once you get that cheque which pulls up your self worth sky-high, your soul will automatically drift towards the bigger and better things in life.

Sometimes, when you are clueless maybe you need that wrong but important girl/guy in your life to make you realize what uplifts that soul big time.

Sometimes you need to climb some small peaks in order to get to the highest peak, as most often it is the small peaks that block your view towards the highest peak and make the journey more frustrating and confusing. Well this worked for me atleast.

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20s may sounds manic emotionally, but it’s not as bad, as long as you keep moving 🙂